


Always Choose You

by hawksmagnolia



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Clintasha - Freeform, Clintasha is my OTP, Declarations Of Love, F/M, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Marvel Universe, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2020-02-10 11:00:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18659089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hawksmagnolia/pseuds/hawksmagnolia
Summary: Because Clint and Nat deserve this. They deserve happily ever after.





	Always Choose You

**Author's Note:**

> This is totally un-beta'd so please forgive the errors.  
> (I've also had a stroke and a traumatic brain injury so sometimes my words don't work like I want them to.)  
> I'm still upset about Endgame so I felt the need to do something to make it right, at least in my world.  
> Otherwise, I'd probably get in trouble for hunting down the Russos and kicking them in the throats.

“I wish you'd hold me when I turn my back  
The less I give, the more I get back  
Oh, your hands can heal, your hands can bruise  
I don't have a choice but I'd still choose you.”  
“Poison and Wine” - The Civil Wars

 

“Hey Tash?”  
“Hmm?” She didn’t look up from her book.  
“I love you.”  
He said it casually, as if he was mentioning the weather. He didn’t look up, almost as if he was afraid of her reaction. Instead, he kept his eyes on the pizza dough he was kneading.  
But Natasha had not been prepared for that. She dropped her book to the rug and she stared at him.  
Only Clint was able to leave her speechless. He knew her better than she knew herself. 

The two of them worked together in perfect unison, a perfectly matched pair.  
It started as strictly professional. But his lopsided grins and offers of whatever candy he was eating at the time wore her down. As he figured out her favorites, she found them stowed next to her gear locker, her seat in the Quinjet, on the counters of her sparse apartment. 

“You know I think love is for children.” She managed to say. She felt a small pop of pride that her voice trembled only slightly. 

She knew he would notice. He always did.

When he snuck into her apartment for the first time, using the vent system he seemed to thrive in, he found a barren living space with only the basic furniture in it and the only personal belongings were clothing and weapons. Over the next few weeks, she found things scattered through her apartment. It started with a couple of polaroids of her with various Avengers, including him. And then a tiny Christmas tree on her counter, bedecked in silver tinsel and purple ornaments and a glittering arrow on top. He had convinced Steve to provide some artwork which Clint framed. He even won a ridiculous stuffed panda on an outing to Coney Island that was nearly half the size of her that took up permanent residence in an armchair in her living room.

He glanced up at her. Her heart twisted at the mixture of hope and fear in his eyes. He had flour on his cheekbone from scratching an itch while rolling out their pizza dough. Clint had taken up cooking and baking after he and Bucky started watching that British baking show together. After several months of fire alarms and Stark threatening to take away their kitchen privileges, the two finally had gotten hang of not setting everything they touched on fire. 

 

All they did was stare at each other in silence because she didn’t know what else to say.

“Well, we’re not talking about you. We’re talking about me.”

Clint dropped his eyes again as he smoothed the dough before deftly tossing it up into the air, his perfect reflexes kicking in as it spun back onto his knuckles. His lips were pressed together in concentration.

Natasha still remembered the first time she kissed him. They’d been undercover, playing as a couple for a SHIELD mission. They were standing around at a poolside cocktail party for a local socialite when the mark started looking at them a little too closely. She grabbed Clint’s face and pressed her lips to his, knowing most people tended to look away from such blatant public displays of affection. He’d only needed a moment to recover before he pulled her tightly against him, his hands going to her waist. He broke the kiss only long enough to smile apologetically before dragging her towards a shadowed corner near the back of the bar. He pushed her against the wall, the lights from the pool area dancing behind him. Nat found herself breathing heavy as he leaned forward and brushed his lips against her ear. She had shivered as he spoke. 

“Tell me to stop. Tell me it’s just for the job.”

She hadn’t been able to. 

 

Natasha felt heat curl low in her belly, remembering how he’d pinned her against that wall. His mouth had been on hers, his hands in her hair. Eventually, he slid his hands under her ass so he could lift her into his arms, her wrapping her legs around his waist. She’d found herself wanting him, needing him, but he’d stopped before that point. He stared at her, panting, his pupils blown with lust.  
“Not here.” He’d told her “Not like this. You deserve so much more.”  
She had tried to disagree but Clint had silenced her with another kiss.

She watched his muscled arms and shoulders bunch under the thin cotton of his shirt. Clint had the fashion sense of a hobo, wearing clothes far past their expiration dates. This one had a faded logo of some kind and was once black but now was a pale grey. His long legs were in flannel pajama pants. Purple with little pizzas on them. Darcy had ordered them for him for Christmas. Nat had actually found herself battling a streak of jealousy when the young intern had presented them to Clint.

 

She picked up her book and neatly placed a bookmark in her place before setting it in her chair as she rose. They were in his place, their place really. She kept her apartment in name only. She preferred the cozy chaos of his rooms. It always smelled like whatever thing he had cooked recently or, sometimes, it just smelled of him. On the rare night they were apart, she find herself pressing her face into his pillows, looking for the scent that was just his. Pictures adorned the walls along with posters and four dart boards. 

They’d kissed in front of their friends for the first time five months later, at Stark’s New Year’s Eve party. They still hadn’t even slept together at that point. Five months after that poolside moment and Nat found herself frustrated at having made no progress in getting Clint naked. She suspected that the others knew something was going on but Clint had made no motions about announcing it. As everyone shouted for the final moments of the year, Nat pulled Clint to her, wrapping her arms around his neck and confirmed all the suspicions of everyone in the room. She’d run her tongue over his lips until he opened his mouth for her, his hands running down her sides. Neither assassin nor spy noticed the silence around them until they both came up for air. Tony had drunkenly clapped loudly calling out it “being about damn time” until Pepper shushed him, Bucky yelled triumphantly at Sam about him winning and being owed $20 and Cap had just grinned. Clint had stared down at her, blue eyes dark with emotion, before he swung her up into his arms and with a bow to their audience and a kick to the door, carried her off to his apartment. 

Nat made her way across the room towards him. Her eyes lingered on the dented wall near the door where he’d stumbled that night carrying her, his shoulder leaving the imprint. He hadn’t dropped her though until they’d collapsed into his unmade bed in a tangle of limbs and lust.

“You don’t love me,” Nat said, trying to be reasonable. Clint didn’t love her. He knew her. He knew everything. He couldn’t love someone with that much red in her ledger. Especially someone with a heart like his.

Clint set down the dough, wiped his hands on a towel and moved towards her.  
“Okay.”  
He leaned against the counter closest to her and pulled her towards him. She stood between his outstretched legs as he put his forehead on hers.

“Okay?” Nat found herself confused. Usually he was the first one to bicker with her.

He shrugged a little and moved only to press his lips to her forehead. 

“So I’m right?”

“No. You’re wrong. But I won’t fight you on it. Because I know I do. I’ve thought about it enough.”

Nat felt her heart skip a beat. She hated it sometimes, the way he could make her feel things that were supposed to have been dead inside her. 

He put his hand on the side of her face and she put hers over it. 

“Clint…”

He cut her off. “No. You listen. I talk. I’ve never said that to anyone before. Ever. Because there’s never been anyone like you. And there never will be again. And I do a lot of dumb shit and our job is dangerous and if I don’t tell you...and you never know...you never hear it...I have to say it. You need to hear it. To feel it. Cause it’s always been us. Always you. You’ve ruined me for anyone else. I don’t have a choice anymore. But even if I did, I’d choose you. I will always choose you. I’ll always choose us.”

Natasha Romanoff was stunned to the point of silence for the second time in 10 minutes. 

“I can’t wait any longer. I don’t want to. I don’t want to run out of time and we’re unfinished.”

His voice caught on the last word and he cupped her face in his calloused hands and took her mouth with his.

Nat sank her teeth into his bottom lip and he hissed at her. She smiled before he claimed her again. 

“Bedroom. Now.” His voice was sandpaper rough as he swept her into his arms and carried her towards his...their bedroom. His long legs made short work of the distance as she buried her face into his neck, his unshaven face rough on her face. 

Despite it being weeks into the new year, they had slept together only in the most literal sense. Between several missions, the holidays, Pepper’s baby announcement party….things had simply been too busy.

Clint laid her down far more gently than she had expected. She pushed herself up onto her elbows so she could yank her tank top over her head and her leggings down and off, leaving her in a black satin and lace edged bra and her matching black lace boy shorts.  
Clint had been pulling his T-shirt over his head and after he tossed it aside, he stood there for a moment. He just stared at her. He’d seen her naked before, enough missions together and you'll end up in a decon shower helping the other wash the shit from their back. But this was different. He looked up at her face, the blue gone from his eyes because his pupils were so blown from want.  
Nat knew her own pupils matched, her eyes soaking up every part of his lean body. Scars were scattered across the skin of his shoulders along with several across his arms and a long one across his ribs on the left side. She could name them all. His pants rode low on his hips, the V on his pelvis framing the tight muscles of his abdomen.

“Fuck. Tash….” his voice sounded strained. She smiled up at him as he straddled her legs and pushed her back onto the bed. He gently kissed her lips before he began slowly dragging his mouth across the skin on her jaw and neck and towards her collarbones. Her heart thumped in her throat as she threaded her fingers into his blonde hair. Clint smiled against the skin between the top of her breast and shoulder. 

“You’re so beautiful.”

Nat’s eyes immediately filled with tears. She’d heard those words many times before but it was different this time. Clint made them real. He made them count. He said them to her…not her current identity.

“Clint….I…” Natasha started before he cut her off by putting a finger over her lips. When had her voice gone all breathless? Where was the emotionless assassin inside her?

“Shhh…” he mumbled, his lips still tracing a path down her body. Her skin prickled under his touch and she felt like jumping out of her skin just so she could pull him closer. As it was, she could feel the heat radiating off his body and his lips but that was it.

Tomorrow there will be the bruises on her neck from his lips and teeth, proof that he was staking his claim on her. Right now she doesn’t care about anything beyond this moment. The feeling of Clint’s mouth on her flesh and the feel of his hard cock against her thigh. 

“Tell me to stop. Tell me this is a bad idea.” he murmurs, having moved back up to lay next to her, his body curled around hers, his mouth right next to the delicate curve of her ear. Natasha paused only for a moment before rolling her hips towards him and pressing her hand against his aching cock. Clint gasped and grabbed her wrist to stop her from going any further.  
She lifts her hand, and his, to her mouth and presses a kiss to the wild pulse on his wrist. 

Her eyes glitter as she answers “It’s a completely bad idea, but…”

“But?”

“I want you…” she whispers, her voice soft. “No…I need you.…and us.”

She arched her back, pressing her body towards him, needing to be closer to him. He slid an arm under her back, clicking the hooks on her bra free as he pulled them together. She yanked the bra off, throwing it to the side as she pressed herself against him. He was so hot, his skin practically sizzling under her fingertips. She grazed the jumping pulse in his neck with her teeth, him groaning as she did.

“Clint…” She pulled him to face her. She ran her thumbs over his cheekbones before kissing him hard, the taste of him across her tongue, keeping him trapped until both of them were left breathless and panting. His hands slid down her sides and then his long fingers are pressing on her through the soaked fabric of her boy shorts. 

“Tasha…fuck.” Clint breathed as his fingertips dipped past the wet lace and over her soaked skin. 

Natasha arched into his hand, her body reacting strictly on its own as she moved to grasp at the waist of his pants. She rocked her hips as he pressed deeper, his thumb grazing over her aching clit. She gasped and reached to wrap her fingers around him, her own thumb sliding over the head of his cock. He said her name, but it was more primal than word, a growl deep in his chest that vibrated her to her core. Clint looked down at her, a look all hunger and want for her that made her need his touch even more. A low rough moan is her only response as he circles his thumb around her clit again as he pushes a single finger and then a second deep into her. As Natasha gasped, her hips pushing to meet his fingers, Clint took her mouth with his own. He broke the kiss, his mouth still almost touching hers, so close that his breath went across her skin as he spoke “You’re fucking glorious Natasha….every part of you.”

Clint never called her Natasha. Not unless he was very serious about something.This made her heart skip a beat…she didn’t allow this kind of intimacy…she never had. Instead of answering she curled her fingers around the satin skin of his cock and then twists as she pulls her hands away from his body. Clint sucked air so fast that for a moment his fingers go still but stay pressed flat against her skin, trapped between her and the lace. His hips rock forward and his eyes close halfway for just a moment. Clint then looks down at her and grins wickedly before ripping the sides of her panties in a fast jerk of his hands. He tosses the fabric to the side and moves out of her reach.

“You keep that up and this won’t last long.” 

Natasha looked up at him through her lashes and returned the smile…as she slid her own fingertips into her soaked cunt and over her clit. 

“Fucking hell Tash….” Clint had to steady himself before he pushed her hand out of the way as he sank to his knees at the edge of the bed. He pressed a kiss to her knee and then began the slow ascent towards her slit. His right hand held onto her knee but he laced the fingers of his left into her right.

Clint gently kissed her slit before slowly licking his way from top to bottom, just barely across her skin. She’s never had a man go to his knees for her, never kiss her thighs in reverence as if in worship. He then pressed his mouth firmly against her, his tongue sliding past her lips, tasting her and then he’s at her core, his tongue licking firmly against her swollen clit as his fingers press deep into her. Then he switches, his tongue buried deep inside hers as his fingers tease her clit. Over and over he repeats this, like a man who’s found something he cannot get enough of. Finally, he presses tow long fingers deep and rough, the callouses scraping against her delicate flesh. He curls them slightly like he.s asking her to come closer as he presses his tongue hard against the ache of her clit.  
And she’s gone. Natasha flies apart, her vision going grey around the edges as the climax takes her fast and furious. The blood rushes hard into her ears and all she knows is that sensation. She comes back to herself as Clint works her with his fingers and mouth. She cries out his name, never having cried any name like this. Clint moves away, leaving her feeling chilled until his body presses against hers, his face looking into hers. She kisses him, tasting herself for the first time, on his lips. Their legs tangle as he curls his body around hers. Natasha runs her hands down his back and then over his cock which bumps against her hip.

She looks up at him, green on blue. His eyes are focused on her face. 

“Do you believe me yet?” 

Natasha doesn’t answer, instead she guides him to her.

“Tash…we don’t…”

She silences him with a kiss as she slowly presses down, letting him stretch her wide. She hadn’t realized how well they’d fit together, how he’d fit her perfectly with only the best stretch and burn as he sank into her. She pushes him onto his back and her on top without ever moving him. He groans as he spreads his hands wide over her hips.

She leans over to kiss his chest, exactly where his heart is. She puts her hand there as she sits back up and he puts both of his over hers. 

Natasha begins to move, her hips rolling back and forth as she slid up and down his cock. Clint held tight to her hand as he pushed towards her, their bodies in perfect rhythm.

Clint groaned her name and released her hand only to wrap his around her waist and he held her tight as moved fluidly to flip her onto her back and him between her bent knees. He thrust forward hard and Natasha cried out his name. Over and over he pressed, driving himself to the hilt, burying himself in her.

Natasha felt her body build, her cunt pulling at him as the world burst into stars for her again. She sat partially up and grabbed onto his shoulders, her legs going around his waist as her heels dug into the small of his back. She pushed with her heels, forcing him completely into her as she came. Clint buried his face into her neck, her hair as his body tensed. “Natasha!” he cried as he came in a hot rush and he clung to her before they both collapsed onto the bed.  
Minutes pass. Their breathing and heart beats slow but they remain tangled together. Natasha is on her back, her left leg under Clint as he lays on his stomach with his left arm thrown across her abdomen and his face next to hers. She isn’t sure he’s even still awake as his breathing is slow and even. She reached over to push some of his hair off his face and one blue eye opened. She smiled faintly down at him. Clint rolled to his side and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her. Natasha laid her head on his chest.

Emotions roll through her, tears prick at her eyes. 

“Tasha…no. Please don’t cry. Please don’t regret….” Clint’s voice cracks as she stops him.

“I’m not supposed to care. I’m not supposed to feel. This is new territory for me. I will never regret this…us. You are the other half of my soul, truly you are my better half.”

Clint blinks several times as if he’s not sure if he heard her correctly. “Tasha…I don’t expect you to say anything just because I said…”

“I will always choose you. Always. For now, that has to be enough.”

Clint’s only answer is to hold her tight as the tears slide down her cheeks.

 

“You're the first face that I see  
And the last thing I think about  
You're the reason that I'm alive  
You're what I can't live without”  
“Don’t deserve you” - Plumb

**Author's Note:**

> Thank y’all so much for the kudos! Feel free to find on on Tumblr (same name as here) and keep watching for more Clintasha, Wintershock and Shieldshock to come! Xoxo


End file.
